Despite living it (minus the stoner,sort of boyfriend) for the past seven months,I finally sawKnocked Uplast night with my girls Lauren and Ash.I felt so connected to the movie—I work in media,Alison Scott works in media.She got over-the-top job news,me too—I was recently published in the French edition of Glamour,sure I can't read French,but it looks good on my resume.Her big sister is the go-to problem solver,my big brother,Carlo,is my rightandleft hand (thanks for my Bugaboo stroller).Everything from the weight gain to the pregnancy test sequence (it has to be wrong-all ten of them!) was so incredibly familiar.
My favorite part of the movie was watching Alison's baby rip through her vagina high school health class/After School Special-style.May I take this time to tell my sisters who have natural births—you're amazing.But thank God I'm having a scheduled C-section.[Quick side note: When I was sixteen I had to have a 10-hour operation to treat an aggressive case of Scoliosis that was crushing my lungs.Now my spine is held together by a couple of rods,screws and wires (the X-rays are pretty hardcore and no,I don't set off alarms in the airport).To avoid any possible injury during labor,my doctor has already scheduled me for a C-section.]
I also loved when Alison had the transvaginal ultrasound (really not a fun experience) and saw that tiny,sesame seed flickering.It reminded me when I saw my baby's heartbeat for the first time.The room was dim,the nurse was quiet and JD and I met.I responded the same way she did—uncontrollable tears that weren't of sadness or happiness,but of something much larger and unexplainable.I felt strangely fulfilled,yet terrified—my connection to him was instant.Even though there was no bump to hold or stroke just yet,I found myself walking out of the office holding on to my stomach like it was a little hand,my only job in the world,to protect this person.