Well this is a sticky guest list situation!
Help!My dad wants to invite his new girlfriend's family to my wedding!Aside from the fact that I've never met her family, we have a big enough family of our own and we're already having huge problems with the guest list.
My dad and his girlfriend have been together for less than a year, but they've already moved in together and are talking marriage.(Which means they're very serious.He was with his last girlfriend for seven years and they never even lived together!)
The wedding isn't 'til next June, so by then my dad will be even closer with her family.But they live three states (or eight hours) away, so there's a good chance my fiance I won't even have met them.
At first my dad just mentioned nonchalantly that he'd like to include her family members "if there's room," but now he's insisting that I invite her mother, four sisters, and their husbands and kids.
To make things trickier, my dad is paying for about 60 percent of the wedding.(My mom is paying for 25 percent and my fiance and I are paying for 15 percent.) If money and space were no object I'd let him invite whoever he wanted.But why should we have to cut our own family members or friends from the guest list in order to include these people we've never met?
Should I try to talk to my dad?Or do I have to suck it up and invite them because he's paying for so much?
Here are my thoughts:
Eeps!This is a tricky one!
If you were paying for the wedding yourselves I'd say you could tell him to can it, but since he's chipping in a big chunk of change, I understand why he feels like he deserves some say in the guest list.
If I were in your shoes, first I'd turn your wedding into a kid-free party, pronto.That should help you trim your guest list a little bit.(If you really wantsomechildren there, I'd invite all the kids to stay for the ceremony through cocktail hour, then hire a couple sitters to bring them all to a quite space at the venue or back to the hotel during the reception.)
After that, I think you should print out your guest list and write down each person's relation to you next to the names.Then bring the list to your dad and ask him who he thinks you should eliminate in order to squeeze in his girlfriend's mom, sisters, and brothers-in-law.It's one thing for him to say, "You just HAVE to make room!" But if he can see that you have to cut your college roommate or your boyfriend's cousin to make room for nine strangers, maybe he'll be more sympathetic.And perhaps you could offer to invitejust她的 mom as a sort of compromise.Or you could suggest putting her sisters and brothers-in-law on your B-list and revisiting the situation as the RSVP cards start rolling in.
But if your dad won't budge, unfortunately I think that you have to invite them.I don't think it's fair of him to mess with your guest list like that, but unless you're prepared to give him back the cash, you need to let him win this battle.
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