You've heardwhat makes guys propose, now hear this: I interviewed some great guys I know to find out why they're not proposing to their long-term girlfriends.And it was an eye-opening experience.Could one of these factors be holding your man back?

Worried man having coffee

These men have all been dating their girlfriends for four - seven years and are all between the ages of 27 and 30, aka they canafford engagement ringsand have been with their significant others long enough to knowwhat they need to know before they get engaged.Here's what they had to say about why they're not proposing:

"She was slow to want to move in with me and seems somewhat petrified of marriage. My only constraint is that I would never propose without living with a girl for at least a year, so I would probably be willing to propose in the next few months if she was ready. As it is, I think our timeframe is most likely the first half of 2011."

"We are still apart on wanting children. I do 100%. She's undecided. She switched her position on having kids after we had been dating for four years. I guess the complication is why her opinion changed and why we are still together."

"There's a great deal of truth to needing things to be fresh and spontaneous. The underlying problem is that by this point in my relationship, it feels like we've mimicked a full life-cycle. The feeling I get is one of hanging around with my wife of 20 years; not that it's bad, but there's no next step and no need for more significant gestures. Since this mock marriage has taken place, wanting to go for a real marriage has become much less likely. I feel that my relationship has in large part run its course, and that's a big part of what keeps me from moving forward. There's certainly no sense that things would improve, and at times, I have a strong feeling that marriage would make things worse."

"My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly four years. We moved in together last fall, and have been very happy with this step. We enjoy living life together; we like traveling and going out. We think of marriage as a step towards starting a family. We definitely talk about getting engaged, but we agree there's no rush."


"She has a job that makes her move all over the place; it's kind of hard to pull the trigger when you don't know where she's going to be working every two years. We're in the same city now, but we've only been able to be a grown-up couple dealing with grown-up couple situations for a short time. I've known I wanted to marry since I met her; it's never been a matter of commitment. If anything, I've been waiting five years to be in the same state just to make sure that it's something we both wanted. We've talked about our potential lives together, but it's kind of hard to take it seriously when you don't live in the same time zone."

Did their answers surprise you?What would your advice to these guys be?Do you think your boyfriend could be thinking any of these same things?

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